LikeALittle, or LAL.com, officially signed up the last creeper among the schools where it’s offered today. As a result, sign-up rates for the site have plummeted.
Stephen Q. Martin, unaware of his symbolic status as the last creeper to sign up, posted a LAL.com flirt about a girl’s feet and another about how a girl reminded him of Sakura, a character from his favorite anime Naruto.
Martin states that his flirts went without a reply.
“They weren’t really my type, anyway,” he said.
LAL.com celebrated the signup, but whispers among investors in the valley show worry over the stalled growth.
“New creepers come in with every freshman class,” said LAL.com CEO Evan Reas. “Flat out, we’re just not worried about our membership numbers. We’ve got plenty of expanding to do.”
The rest of Reas’ interview cannot be published, as the Founder Daily Editor has decreed “No more goddamn Facebook articles for a while,” and Reas just wouldn’t stop making the comparison.